Part 7
A church’s culture consists of such things as its traditions, heroes, expectations, norms, stories, rituals, symbols, rewards, and—most important—its values. A congregation’s culture ties its people together and gives meaning and purpose to the ministry’s life. It produces a sense of identity, stability, and sets boundaries.
—Aubrey Malphurs
VALUES
Mentors, coaches, and consultants must have a strong set of values to work from to provide themselves a firm foundation and clear purpose. Values not only provide leaders with a foundation and purpose, they also provide direction. Values are like the fletching on an arrow; they keep us on course as we head for our target. One of Christ’s main purposes for coming to earth was to both reestablish and reinforce the values of the kingdom of God. The religious leaders of His day had all but buried kingdom values beneath an overwhelming mass of extraneous rules and regulations.
You Pharisees and teachers are show-offs, and you're in for trouble! You give God a tenth of the spices from your garden, such as mint, dill, and cumin. Yet you neglect the more important matters of the Law, such as justice, mercy, and faithfulness. These are the important things you should have done, though you should not have left the others undone either (Matthew 23:23 CEV).
Football Coach Bill Parcells wrote a book on leadership entitled, Finding a Way to Win, and built the whole manuscript around values.
“The most effective leaders,” Parcells argued, “are those who know their values and live accordingly.” The chief difference between winners and losers, according to another leadership book by Tichy, is that “winning individuals and companies have thought about their values and apply them more rigorously” (Tichy, qtd. from Collins 90).
Collins points out, “You won’t be truly effective as a leader or a coach until you have a clear handle on your own values—knowing what they are and living them” (91). He goes on to say, “People being coached will never move forward until they deal with the issue of values. And no church, college, organization, or business will survive with strength and soar with success until the people involved have committed to a common set of values” (91).
Because values are at the core of who we are, it is tough to understand why they are so challenging to define and hard to identify. Collins says of values:
They are foundational beliefs that anchor our lives, the things that matter to us the most, and the nonnegotiable characteristics that best define our identities. …People who haven’t thought about their values are more easily swayed by circumstances, fads, and the opinions of others. In contrast, people who live in harmony with their basic life-governing values sense greater inner peace and usually feel that their lives are on target and less out of control. Leaders who know and abide by their values are more decisive and effective. Companies, churches, and organizations guided by clear values are more likely to move forward with less floundering and vacillation (92-93).
One of the primary responsibilities of disciple makers is to help people discover what key values lie at the core of their life. Values lie at the very heart of God’s Word. It is not the responsibility of disciple makers to impose their own values upon others. However, by helping another person discover their core values, they will have a better ability to answer tough questions like: “Who am I?” “Why am I here?” “How do I want to live?” “What kind of person do I want to become?” “What legacy do I want to leave in life?” Having clarified these issues, people are then free to move forward in life with a higher degree of confidence. In this regard, clear values motivate us. They are also crucial in helping us make quality decisions. Furthermore, they become the foundation upon which we can enjoy personal growth and ultimately experience a satisfying level of personal peace.
Mark Twain once made a statement about the weather that applies to a lot of things, including disciple making. “Thunder is good; thunder is impressive; but it is the lightning that does all the work.”
“What matters isn't those who planted or watered, but God who made the plants grow” (1 Corinthians 3:7 CEV). Those who would accept the challenge of disciple making must remember that outside of an intentional coalition between themselves and God, there is little lasting value that will result from their investment. A Christian mentor, coach, or consultant must never forget that it is God who makes the plants grow! All our big ideas will have “about as much effect on the world as thunder, unless they are energized by the lightning of the Holy Spirit” (Adsit 48). “I am the vine, and you are the branches. If you stay joined to me, and I stay joined to you, then you will produce lots of fruit. But you cannot do anything without me” (John 15:5 CEV).
I like what Christopher Adsit says about trying to second-guess the Holy Spirit’s plans for your life:
We can fly into the Holy Spirit’s plans like a sparrow into a jet engine—and get fried in the process—or we can cooperate with Him in the perfect plan he has in mind. God’s Spirit says to us, “I’d love to have you on the team I’m putting together to help this child of Mine grow, but I’ll not tolerate the pride of a grandstander” (49).
We’re called to love God with all our being and to love others. We’re called to be faithful to our spouses and diligent in raising our children. We’re instructed to forsake selfish ambition, envy, the love of money, and dishonest gain. The Bible values forgiveness, purity, faithfulness, and obedience to God’s Word, humility, servanthood, diligence, and compassion. Ignore these and other biblical values and you experience disharmony and sacrifice deep inner peace (Collins, 100).
COMMUNITY
Dr. Wayne Lee asserts, “Christianity is lived in community. No person is an island. Being a person isn't about being something independent of everything else. Personhood is constituted by relationships with others. Human beings are created as separate individuals. But it isn’t God’s ultimate plan. God, Himself, reveals a model of a community whose love is so complete that their unity of action makes it appropriate to see them as a single entity—the Trinity. “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them” (Genesis 1:27). God did not create him (Adam), he created them (Adam and Eve) and placed them in community. He gave them responsibilities and held them accountable.
Responsibility and accountability go hand in hand. Biblical accountability is asking another friend to help you maintain an agreed upon Christian standard for the purpose of spiritual growth or ministry success. Personal accountability is always voluntary. The bottom line: Accountability is one of God’s best tools, which drastically increases the chances of spiritual growth. The Christian life is a journey…a process that begins with regeneration and continues throughout life and a process that is best realized in community. That God wants his children to grow is clear. The following scriptures support this position:
Don't become so well adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you (Romans 12:2 MSG).
It is in community that personal and spiritual growth will most likely happen as believers develop meaningful growth relationships. As the scriptures have already affirmed, God wants his children to grow. The inference is that He is pleased when they do grow and displeased when they don’t. However, just as natural parents nurture their children in a systematic way; it is obvious that God also has a plan for nurturing his children.
Stop being hateful! Quit trying to fool people, and start being sincere. Don't be jealous or say cruel things about others. Be like newborn babies who are thirsty for the pure spiritual milk that will help you grow and be saved (1 Peter 2:1-2 CEV).
For he spoke, and it came to be; he commanded, and it stood firm. The Lord foils the plans of the nations; he thwarts the purposes of the peoples. But the plans of the Lord stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations (Psalms 33:9-11 NIV).
I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV).
Adsit paraphrases Luke 9:57-62 as follows:
I plan for you to grow up! I want you out of the nursery and into the foxhole! I need soldiers not bed-wetters. I need finishers, not starters. I need people who can plow straight furrows, and if you’re going to keep looking back, you’re not fit for My kingdom (72).
A disciple maker’s job, after all, is to help new Christians grow up, capable Christians shape up, and maturing Christians step up.
PASSION—PERSONAL AND CORPORATE
I am convinced that my plan, to effectively integrate and implement disciple making into the heart of the new organizational model for the South Carolina District, will depend largely on this one indispensable ingredient: passion. Just as no aspiring Olympic athlete can realistically reach a gold metal without being coached; neither can they achieve their desired goal without passion! “At its core, passion is a powerful underlying emotion that energizes and drives us” (Collins 103). In his book, The Passion Plan, psychologist Richard Chang describes passion as personal intensity. “If you have passion for something, it strikes a chord in you. It heightens your awareness, engages your attention, and kindles excitement…. Passion is empowering. You may bludgeon it, suppress it, squash it, or lose sight of it, but it is a given, a constant. Your passion is ready and willing to provide all the stamina and inspiration you need” (16). “…When passion is recognized and allowed to work, it empowers ordinary people to make great things happen” (Qtd. from Collins 104). “Leaders are NOT the only ones who are energized by the passion of their vision. Followers thrive on it” (Hybels 35)
After you have had the courage to dream big dreams—when the obstacles rise up threatening to dash them to pieces; when you begin to take into account all the long hours and work; when the initial excitement dies down and you face the fact that failure is a possibility; when less challenging pursuits and routine activities look more inviting— someone needs to rekindle your passion. That’s the goal of mentors, coaches and consultants. “Like vision, passion tends to fade. Both need frequent rekindling” (qtd. in Collins 107). The disciple maker’s job includes drawing out a disciple’s passion and channeling it into something positive.
Living out your passion is not easy. Therefore it is imperative to find supportive people. This, again, is the role of a disciple maker—being supportive. There are more than enough skeptics around; people who can find ample excuses for losing sight of what you want to accomplish and killing your dream. Avoid them like the plague. A disciple maker must be a person who is able to inspire, motivate, adopt your goals, and rekindle your passion. Disciple makers are passion promoters who can make the difference between defeat and success. Don’t hang around passion busters. Determine to only rub shoulders with passion builders.
Christians who have passion are people “filled with God.” They radiate enthusiasm about their lives and activities. If they are leaders and coaches, they inspire and motivate others by their Spirit-led passion and sense of purpose. And they help others catch the passion and get a sense of purpose as well” (Collins 114).
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